BIRTH AND BEREAVEMENT DOULA
If you are here because you have just received bad news about your pregnancy, I am sorry.
You have my heart-felt sympathy. I hope you can find some helpful information here on my website, but more than that, I hope that what you read here makes you feel more comfortable giving me a call for help.
What is a birth and bereavement doula, and how could a birth and bereavement doula help me?
First, let’s define “doula”. A doula is a non-medical birth assistant. The word doula comes from a Greek word for servant. A traditional doula is present at a labor and birth (and sometimes postpartum) to provide comfort measures for mom and make sure mom and partner have the support they need so they can focus on their baby’s birth.
A birth and bereavement doula is an extension of this concept.
A birth and bereavement doula has been trained in these traditional doula comfort measures, and they have also been trained in caring for those who are experiencing a miscarriage, stillbirth, or possibly fatal prenatal diagnosis.
Here are some practical ways I can help:
- Listen to your story and provide emotional support
- Accompany you to a confirmation ultrasound
- Help you think about, and plan for, how you want to meet and say goodbye to your baby
- Provide comfort and care during labor
- Assist you in making mementos after birth – photos, footprints, etc.
- Arrange pastoral care if you desire
- Walk you through your funeral and burial options for baby
- Be with you and support you as you say goodbye to baby, both at the hospital, and at the funeral home
- Connect you with resources for grief support
Obviously the loss of a baby is a deeply personal time, and how much involvement you want from a doula is completely up to you. Also, prenatal loss comes in many forms at many stages. I will provide support for a birth at any stage of pregnancy.
If you are experiencing early pregnancy loss, you and your baby are still worthy of support. I may not be there when your baby passes, but can be only a phone call or text away to listen and assist with needs you may have. If your loss requires a D&C or other surgical procedure I will not be able to be with you for the procedure, but I can be with you before and after and help you find ways to celebrate your baby’s life and honor your baby’s memory. No matter what situation you are in, I will listen and am always ready and willing to pray for you.
**Reminder – A doula is not a medical service provider. I cannot provide medical advice or answers. I can support you within the birth scenario that you have planned with your doctor or midwife.**
“Jenni had such as important role in helping us through the loss of our baby. She was there to help make decisions and think of things we didn’t. It’s such a relief to have someone to be your advocate and take some of the burden off you and your spouse’s shoulders. Jenni helped take care of everything from picking out a funeral home to making sure we had pictures with our sweet boy. Having a doula was such an important part of our recovery and we are forever grateful for the prayer, knowledge, and support Jenni provided.“ – Courtney and Charles M.
Stillbirthday.com has lots of resources that aid in exploring your options for birth at every stage of pregnancy.
What is the cost for birth and bereavement doula services?
No one makes contingency plans in case their baby dies. The loss of a baby pre- or post-birth is always a shock. Also, there is no one-size-fits-all doula support package for loss births, every loss birth is so different. Because of this, I have opted for a pay-it-forward method of reimbursement. As per my contract, you are not required to pay anything for my services.
I ask that you would consider giving an amount of your choice, in pay-it-forward fashion, to enable the next family in need to receive birth and bereavement doula care.
